|Everyone was so upset about the Baby, It’s Cold Outside song, but I’ve been more concerned with Santa Claus is Coming to Town.|
You better watch out
You better not cry
You better not pout
I’m telling you why
This is where Baby, It’s Cold Outside starts.
So many of our kids are not taught about their emotions. We are taught that it’s bad to feel certain emotions. We are taught that it’s bad to show certain emotions. We are taught that if we feel certain emotions we will be punished. We are taught that “negative” emotions are something to be avoided at all costs. Our emotional experiences are minimized. We are not heard. We are not taught or shown the appropriate ways to feel and manage our emotions.
All of this leads to dysfunction. Dysfunctional relationships, dysfunctional coping skills, dysfunctional communication, dysfunctional self worth, dysfunctional families.
What would our world be like if, instead of telling our children to “stop crying”, “cheer up”, “be a big boy”, “look on the bright side”, or “I’ll give you something to cry about”, we acknowledged our children’s pain as real and allowed them to feel?
What if they knew that Santa would still come, even if they were sad?
#thephxcenter #feelings #emotions #grief #trauma #feeldealheal